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I was never particularly interested in writing about vampires even before the market got flooded with them, but long story short, I have this short story forming in the back of my mind about a vampire who supervises the late shift at a university research library's archive and is also the kind of perky dork who collects master's degrees mostly for fun and does her document scanning while rocking out to Pat Benatar and laughing out loud at the stupid little jokes she makes to herself about the names on the records she's digitizing.

I know that the protagonist is a student worker in the archive, and I have the first and one of the last scenes and the basic framework of the plot sketched out in my head. A group of well, basically Mennonite-style vampires--they live in their own isolated rural community without anything that's developed since the 19th century--show up with something they claim they'll donate to the archive if she can convince them it'll be in good hands. What they actually want is something already in the archive that they very much shouldn't have.

The scene I had in mind that the protagonist and vampboss had figured out what these guys were actually up to and go back at some point after the archive has closed. They were exactly right, and the visiting vamps are there. And in the course of trying to figure out how to work this thing called a com-pu-ter or open the folding shelves, they've managed to
turn on her music so that basically everyone's sneaking around the office in the dark with "Everybody Lay Down" blaring over the computer's speakers.

But then I started hearing "Thriller" on the radio all the time because apparently Halloween starts in mid-September now, and I'm really tempted to use that song instead (since she'd totally have that one on her computer too), with the POV character tossing off something to the effect of "oh, of course it's this one." But I'm concerned that the humor might seem a little forced or corny, or might spoil the mood of the scene.

It's just the tiny, most niggling detail but it's bugging me so much. Do you think it makes much difference to the story which I go with?

This is a semi-Victorian, semi-steampunk-ish alternate world fantasy setting.

Background: T has been kidnapped by pirates led by M, who are using her as bait to get J. J, E, and I (along with 3 soldiers, who are meant to escort J back to their city for trial) plan to rescue T, of course, despite knowing that it's a trap meant for J. They have to go to Muir (a bit like Tortuga in PotC, but worse - actually,there's probably a fair amount of this book that's PotC ispired), the island where T is being held captive by the pirates.

One of their problems in getting to Muir is that there is a large maelstrom surrounding the island, where the island stays ok mostly because it's in the eye of the storm (I'm still working out the mechanics on this). There's a passage that's difficult to navigate, and fairly impossible if you don't know what you're doing. J knows about it, but hasn't gone that way since he was twelve, so he's a little rusty. To get through this, theyve found S, an old friend of J's and M's, to help get them through (even though she hasn't taken that path in even longer than J, probably still knows it better).

I've got some ideas for the series of events that goes next, but it starts with them trying to rescue T, and I think they need to have some sort of plan for rescuing her. Not a foolproof one, but something better than "let's charge in there and hope no one notices." Most likely, I and S will turn back once they've gotten the others through (S because she doesn't really want to have anything to do with M, and I because she's not a fighter, and since she and S are both the scientific geniuses, everyone figures it would be safer and more useful for her to go back with S). J, at least, and possibly E (maybe the others) will get captured and find T. T, meanwhile, has become addicted to a new drug M is making, so her willingness to leave is compromised by the fact that she can't get the drug anywhere else. That could be where their plan fails, except I don't know if I want to reveal her until after J gets captured.

My first problem is trying to figure out their plan, though. It should be easy to sabotage, since M is expecting J to come, and one of the soldiers with the group has betrayed them in the past, and might do so again.

Any suggestions for decent plans, or how I might possibly go about trying to create one?

Current Mood: thoughtful

I am working on a story where a couple is getting engaged in two months (in this story, an engagement is almost like getting married, the actual marriage is more a confirmation).

The Main Male Character/MMC is a former soldier who was sort of kicked out of the force and got into the business of his future father in law (merchant ships).

Now my plan is to have the MMC called back for 1 more operation with the forces. What I am wondering about is, if this action should take place before or almost right after the engagement ceremony. I see options for both.

Before: the uncertainty if he will be back in time, in one piece, or at all.
After: the shattered good moment while the couple is still on cloud nine, the agony of both lovers being torn apart with the unspoken prospect of him perhaps not returning.

What are your thoughts on this? I can't decide at the moment...

Current Mood: pensive

I have a post-apocalyptic world. (The apocalypse in question is a ten-year world war that used physical, chemical/biological, and nuclear weapons.) The world is mostly based on our own, though as it's post-apocalyptic, technology, communications, etc. are broken down and much less common than they used to be. However, now they have magic.

I've worked out that magic is a genetic trait; a long time ago, people with magic existed but were rare. Then they stopped being able to use magic. Now that the war has destroyed whatever infrastructure element kept the magic hidden and dormant, magic users--who are more resilient against modern weaponry and therefore have survived in greater numbers than they previously had--are able to use magic and out in the open again.

My problem is the infrastructure element. The original suggestion I had was cell phone towers/lines, but I think that's too recent. If magic existed up until the time cell phones were invented, the world wouldn't be all that much like ours. I want something that changed longer ago.

Other suggestions I've had are the steam engine and the printing press. The first doesn't seem insidious enough (and now that I think about it, steam engines haven't been widely used for a long time, have they?), and while the second is kind of awesome and I've worked it subtly into a short little story, it seems too nebulous. I guess it's hard to explain. I also thought of using plumbing, and having magic unable to cross running water, but I've been able to find frustratingly little on the history of plumbing, so I don't know how well it would work.

Any suggestions? Reasons one of the other things would work better than I thought? Throw 'em at me!

I didn't do NaNo this year because I didn't have the time or anything I wanted to write, but I've been doing

origfic_bingo instead. If nothing else, it's got me wanting to work some more on stories that I'd given up as irreparable a while ago. But the more I look at them, the more I come to realize that all three ideas have giant flaws in the basic plot/premise. This is driving me nuts. I'm afraid this post was long; it seemed better than spamming the forum with a post for each plot problem.

( Problem 1 )
( Problem 2 )
( problem 3 )

I need some random, crazy ideas here.

The setting is an alternate world, a bit remniscent of Victorian America, but with steampunk elements. Magic/energy in this world is evthene, composed of revtha (physical) waves, and kethna (spiritual) waves. There has been a lot of research into manipulating revtha (think kinetic energy, temperature, electricity, etc.), but not much is known about using/controlling kethna.

I need ideas for a guy trying to politely discourage a girl who wants to marry him, without offending her or her father (who has a lot of political influence, and is bad to offend, basically). He has a sister who likes to invent things, and is pretty good at manipulating revtha.

Good and bad ideas are welcome. Actually, bad ideas might be even better than good ones, though I'd appreciate some heads up on the ways the bad ideas could go wrong (For the most part, at this point, this is for conversation pieces, as the guy and his sister brainstorm ways for him to get out of his betrothal, as neither of them can really stand the bride-to-be for long periods of time). I'm thinking that later on, they might try one or two of them.

Help!

Current Mood: thoughtful

Okay. You, and a bunch of your friends, are going off to colonize an alien planet.

You know that this planet has:

Gravity, heat, light, temporal cycles, elemental resources, and weather that are close enough to Earth's that most reasonably adaptable Earth species can survive and breed there.

A functioning carbohydrate-based planetary ecosystem that does basic things like keep the atmosphere oxygenated and soils fertile and dead things rotting and oceans thawed and all the other cycles rolling, and has been around long enough that much of the geology is fossilized (so there are probably coal and petroleum and carbonite deposits, etc.)

A fairly large landmass with a subtropical/Mediterranean-like climate with warm temperatures year-round, no major extreme weather, and ample seasonal rainfall, where you are planning to settle.

However, the planet's biology is not close enough to Earth's that Earth life can interact with it on any complex level. You can count on being able to use native life for things like fibers and building material and fuel and maybe latex and dyes, but anything you want to eat or use for medicine you'll have to bring with you. Along with pollinators and symbiotic fungi and any other life needed to keep that life going. And you're going to need to be self-sufficient within a year or two of arrival, with a fairly small initial population and very limited technological resources. On the plus side, local diseases, pests, and predators are mostly going to ignore anything Earth-based.

If you could have your pick of all species currently alive anywhere on Earth(and maybe a few that are recently extinct, and maybe a few that need a tiny bit of gene-tinkering first), what among Earth life would you bring with you? I am especially interested for species that aren't currently common food products in Europe/North America.

Okay... So, this isn't part of an actual story or a full-born plot bunny(yet), but just a thought-bone that my imagination has been chewing on, and I'm feeling compelled to work it out.

( gnaw, gnaw ...mumble, mumble... gnaw )

How would a book, with an intelligence and will of its own, act on its will? It's hard to be a protagonist (or antagonist) if you can't actually do anything for yourself.

Since "Body" equals "Movement," at least on some level, I'm thinking that the book's mind might be bound up in the movement of pen on paper, when its letters were formed...

But I don't know. Any ideas?

Supposing you picked up a book (secondary world fantasy, FWIW) and from beginning to end, it didn't have a single mention of religion in it. What would you think? I mean, none of the characters, major or minor, are religious, no places of worship, no names of gods, no forces beyond mortal ken, no epithets or swears or the like. How hard would you roll your eyes?

( I am examining my worldbuilding for flaws. )

Can I accomplish my story in a world with no religion, or is that just too implausible?

Okay, y'all, I need some help. I'm trying to outline a superhero story, and for hero-related reasons, I'd really like my villain to be a shapeshifter.

The thing is, I can only think of sneaky-infiltration type plots for shapeshifters, and that doesn't mesh with my superhero (she's a little more, hmm, think Wonder Woman or Spider-Man instead of Batman or Daredevil).

I am fully capable of pulling full-blown ideas out of tiny bits, so large or small, what kind of villainous deeds might a shapeshifter commit?

PS: it's set in the modern USA, in a world that's accustomed to superheroes. I'd like to avoid such overdone, boring schemes as "taking over the world," "blowing up something big and important" and "creating new real estate from radioactive minerals."

Ok, I need a bit of brainstorming power here. I have a short story that’s almost ready to write, but one of the two main characters needs development. It will be a futuristic story (not certain how futuristic – could be 10, 20 years in the future, could be 500). The character in question has committed a crime, and is on Death Row (or whatever the futuristic cultural equivalent of that is.) He’s pretty much sitting in a cell during the story, having a conversation with his executioner.

I’m trying to decide what his crime was, and what his job/life was beforehand. It needs to be something that would merit/require a private execution (or, another thought would be to have all executions in this place be private, because the population has gotten to the point where they don’t want to see executions anymore. And also, the executions have gotten…. softer (sort of), as a result of people protesting for more humane executions. Votes, anyone?). So far, the only idea I’ve come up with is that he found out some government secret, and they want to get rid of him privately, so he won’t tell anyone. Except, I’m not wanting to copy Serenity (At this point, the word “Miranda” starts echoing in my head).

Facts about the prisoner: He is intelligent, and probably has a challenging job. He has a wife and kids. Yeah…. That’s about all I’ve got.

Any ideas? Anything at all?

I'm not sure this is exactly the right forum, since I'm asking kind of a broad discussion question, although it does relate to something specific I wrote, sort of. I would have posted it in

fantasy, but it's more of a horror thing if it belongs to any genre, which is a bit alarming when I consider that horror is about as far from my genre pool as possible.

What do you think about ghost trains? Have you ever read or heard a ghost train story? Do you think they're interesting, and if so, what's the most interesting thing about them? Or do you prefer some other ghost method of transportation, like ghost ships (cf. the Flying Dutchman -- warning, TV Tropes time-eating sand-pit link)?

I am not usually one for ghosts, barring The Sims 3. For some reason, though, the phrase "ghost train" got stuck in my head a while back and I want to write something about it. I just can't figure out if it should be a story or a poem, or, heavens forbid, a novel.

Current Mood: confused

Guys, I really need your help. This is a pretty much relationship advice for a romance novel, though, so I'm sorry if the question seems stupid or inappropriate.

Now. The story is set in the modern era Western-type society, about 7-10 years in the future. There is a couple that once had a sudden, bright and passionate romance, that, sadly, turned out to be pretty short-lived. Therefore, they divorce, having gone from being madly in love to hostility. The question is, they have a 2 y.o. baby which I need to stay with its father after the divorce.

I don't want to demonize the mother and I really don't want to kill her off (she's not a bad person, besides, it would be awesome if I could still have this character later in the story), but I need to somehow make it work. Being a woman myself I honestly cannot come up with any explanations. This has to be a non-scandalous arrangement, no forcing the kid away from her mother or something. They have to agree on the terms. I need some valid reason for the mother to agree that the baby will be better off with the father, although she and her ex-husband are now pretty hostile to each other. The mother is about 27-29 when she divorces her husband. Also, she's a kind of a performer (not a celebrity!) traveling a lot, so maybe the arrangement can somehow be tied to that?

All and any input on this will be appreciated. :)

I cannot get my characters to drop exposition.

I'm working on a fantasy involving a parallel dimension inhabited by the personifications of character tropes and archetypes. I suppose you could think of them as being in the same general ballpark as the Endless from Neil Gaiman's "Sandman" comic. They appear as ordinary people (or most of them do, anyway), but they sort of influence their world based on the trope they represent--the Wise Woman's sphere of influence is a very serene place and others sort of naturally turn to her for advice, the Pirate Queen is a cut-throat corporate CEO surrounded by similarly ruthless business folk--if that makes sense. My main character, Fox, is a pretty ordinary woman who owns a bookstore and gives Tarot readings in a little college town in southwestern Ohio. She's got no reason to know any of this.

My problem is that none of my trope-world characters will tell her about it once she gets entangled in their problems. What's happened is that the Pirate Queen's gentleman friend, the Knight in Shining Armor, went missing shortly after Fox did a Tarot reading for him at her bookshop. The Pirate Queen doesn't believe that Fox had nothing to do with her and tells her basically that she'd better either give him back or find out what happened to him, or else. All the trope characters involved are too worried about their own problems to slow down and tell her what's what or don't care that she doesn't know.

The villain was supposed to show up to Fox’s house looking like a pair of normal people so that it could try to ferret out of her what she knows about all this. Then when it was inside it would sort of gradually lose track of its human form, drop some hints and minor explanations and a warning, and leave. But it basically swept in in its normal nightmare form, said, “heh, you really don’t have any idea what’s going here at all, do you? Now keep your damn mouth shut or else,” killed her pet lizard, and swept out. It told her its name when she asked, but it didn’t do any of the explaining I’d meant it to do.

There’s also a later scene where Fox goes to meet with the Pirate Queen (O’Malley), who would explain the whole thing. What has happened is that O’Malley has skipped that section of the conversation entirely. I’m still working on it, but pretty much the conversation has been a one-sided “Okay, so where is he? I don’t believe that you don’t know anything about this, quit playing stupid. Yeah, I don’t care what my assistant told you I’d do–What? The scary villain's involved? You’ve seen what it does, and it hates him more than it hates most people. Oh crap, this is bad. This is really bad. Get out there and do something about it.” from O’Malley. Even when I try to steer the conversation the way I want it to go by having Fox come right out and ask “whoa, wait, you’re dating a knight? What are you talking about?” O’Malley completely ignores the question.

There is one more character (or pair of characters, I’m still not exactly sure) Fox is going to be spending time with who might do a better job of explaining it to her, but his attitude is pretty much “look, lady, I don’t care, I know what’s going on here so just be quiet and let me lead.” Also Fox doesn’t really like or trust him very much. I have one last one who might tell her what's up because he likes feeling like he's smarter than other people, but I'm not positive he doesn't die before she comes on the scene.

Even aside from where it fits, having someone saying "why yes, I'm the Whatever, we're all this" seems really artificial to me. People don't talk about themselves like that. I just can't figure out how to get this idea across. Anyone else have any ideas?

So, I have a scene in my NaNovel (this is actually the same one I was talking about in the guns and technology question) where Main Character's Fiance (Tiresse) has joined the military squad that's been assigned to hunt him down (she's taken the place of a new recruit that this was going to be his first mission anyway - why they're sending an utter newbie as part of the squad to hunt down a "dangerous criminal" and why they have a squad made up of people who have never met each other before from all over their military - I don't know. Those are plot holes that are going to need fixing later).

In this scene, the squad is traveling, Tiresse takes out the gun which she's never actually used before, screws something up, and one of the more experienced squad members (who she's seen before and is hoping that he won't recognize her during the journey) decides to help her out and teaches her how to use the darned thing.

1) Any recommendations on a gun I ought to be using here specifically?

I had looked around here (ok apparently my trying to direct you straight to the firearms page results in me breaking the link, so that's the main page) and liked the look of a lot of those, but I'm not sure which ones would be more of a military-style gun, aside from the muskets (and I was hoping to find something with a shorter barrel)

I also looked at this: http://www.amazon.com/18th-Century-Pirate-Flintlock-Pistol/dp/B000MGID10 and thought that as I've got pirates, something like that might be good for them to carry around, but I don't know that it would do me as much as military weapons.

2) what kinds of problems would a complete newbie have with firing a gun in general, and 19th century guns in particular? (I looked for beginner guides online, but what I've found looks geared towards automatic/semi-automatic pistols. Which isn't what the military's going to have, at least, at this point).

Current Mood: thoughtful

For those of us writing lengthy prose, I want to pose the question--What do you think about chapters?

I tend to read books straight through, so I don't notice chapters. This, unfortunately, means I have a hard time writing them. I know they serve a purpose, but what? You tell me.

Should they all be approximately the same length in a given work? Why do they exist at all? Should there be internal structure in a chapter? A cliffhanger ending? How do chapters function for readers?

Current Mood: curious

You know, that advise you get all the time. It has some truth to it (especially if not taken to literally).

But what do you do if you suffer from prosopagnosia (facial blindness), when you couldn't describe the face of someone you knew if your life depended on it even? If you are incapable of reading facial expressions (at least, if they are not really exaggerated). Does that mean you have to write stories about faceless beings who never shows the slightest hint of an expression on their faces? It would be all right if your character had the same condition, but if you don't want that...?

This is not just a question out of idle curiosity, I have these problems, and so far I have avoided it by using generic descriptions (put together from stuff I've read), but it feels a bit like cheating (no, no, not word-by-word, of course not - but still!) - and I'm terrified someone will, eventually, see through it. After all, I know it's fake!

Or, do I have no choice but to continue as I do now?

[somewhat cross-posted]

Ok, I've started work on another of my projects - this one set in an alternate world that is mostly generic fantasy (i.e. medieval Europe) with a backstory based on the fall of Atlantis and Ancient Greece.

Does anybody know any honorifics used in either medieval Europe or Ancient Greece (or modern Greece, for that matter? I could work with that) to address commoners, peasants, or basically people without any real standing or nobility? I feel like I overuse sir,madam, and ma'am. I'm looking for something to replace Mr. and Mrs. in modern usage.

The very specific situation I'm looking at right now involves a group of three of my main characters (T, F, and A). A and F are keeping an old woman busy while T is treating her husband of an illness). I'm trying to figure out how A and F would address the old woman politely (so "Old Lady!" is pretty much out.

This feels like something I ought to know (well, for medieval European-style fantasy, anyway), and have probably seen in books before, but I'm completely blanking out now.

Thanks in advance for the help!

EDIT: Wow, thanks for al the help, guys! I think I've got what I need for this now. Whoo!!

Current Mood: thoughtful

So there I am, about four chapters into the novel I'm working on now, sailing along, thinking about maybe trying to move my next chapter earlier in the book, when suddenly I realize that I have a big problem with the next chapter coming up in my half-hearted stab at an outline.

My FMC is a psychic who co-owns a New Age bookstore and does readings there, Tarot and the I Ching and things. In her first chapter, a weird guy (WG) turns up in the store. She isn't even sure that he's actually a person instead of a ghost or spirit or something like that, he just feels wrong. WG is fairly pleasant except for being really, really weird and asking lots of odd questions. Specifically he wants to know if she's seen a certain man lately and if she did any readings for him. FMC kind of blows him off so that he'll go away, he creeps her out so badly.

In the last chapter I finished, FMC has been kind of uneasy for a few days. WG and the man he was asking about have been on her mind and she doesn't know why. In the middle of a reading, she has a vision of the sudden, intense sort she hardly ever gets--the man WG was asking about is in a lot of trouble and suddenly the ominous cards she read for him make a lot of sense. Also she gets kind of a sense during the vision that WG might have something to do with it, and even if he doesn't it's probably a good thing she didn't tell him what he wanted to know.

The weird guy is from the alternate world where the embodiments of character archetypes and tropes live. So far as anyone knows this early in the story, he works for the Woman Warrior but isn't anything specific himself. The current Woman Warrior (the tropes sort of change over time, it's complicated) is more of a ruthless corporate executive than an actual battlefield fighter, and she has an office in the city nearest to the little town where FMC lives. The next chapter I had planned was the one where he turns up again at FMC's shop a few days or a week later and takes her downtown so the Woman Warrior can basically explain the plot (the man FMC read the cards for is Woman Warrior's gentleman friend. He's gone missing and the last place anyone saw him was around FMC's shop. So she'd better tell them where he is or go find him, or else).

So if she's had, all of these big flashing warning signs up until now, then why in the hell would she just be like "sure, let's go!" when WG turns up again insisting she get in his car or whatever and come with him? I'd been thinking that she doesn't want to look like a flake in front of her business partner when WG shows up, and/or she just wants to get to the bottom of what's going on here, and/or she thinks that this might be only way to help the man she saw in the vision since the police aren't going to take that kind of story real seriously. But would those be strong enough reasons for her to just up and get in a car with a man who spooked her out so badly the other day?

Edit: Okay, new question.

I've had a few people suggest various places that perhaps FMC is willing to with WG because he rescued her from something, maybe something he staged, which started me thinking.

There's a character in the story who's a particularly nasty piece of work, the Villain's Hounds (like the Nazgûl, Gmork, Croup and Vandemar--the beastie that the villain sends out on "find and destroy" missions). In an earlier draft of my outline I'd been planning to send it to visit FMC after she'd gone to Warrior Woman's office. She didn't buy any part of what Woman Warrior had to say; FMC's attitude was more or less "lady, you're crazy, let me go home now." Then the Hounds showed up to warn her off and that was what made her change her mind about staying out of it. If there are things like that taking an interest in her, she wants this business done. I'd decided not to do that because I thought it pushed the start of the story back too far (and, now I think of it, it still doesn't address the question of why she'd go to the office with Weird Guy anyway). Then I'd been considering a scene after the guy in trouble escapes and FMC meets up with him where the Hounds come to ask her if she's seen this person they need to talk to (but I was sort of lukewarm on that idea since it's basically identical to one from early in "Neverwhere").

I'll show my hand a little and admit that Weird Guy and the Hounds are working together on something I could totally see WG saying to it, "look, she won't listen to me, you go put the fear of, um, you into her." And then either WG happens along right at the most opportune moment to save her from the Hounds, or after it's gone FMC calls the number on his card he gave her and says okay, if this kind of crazy crap is going to keep happening, maybe we can talk. Woman Warrior isn't in on their plans so I'm not sure quite why they'd want to drive FMC to her.

My question here: is this too much happening before we get to the explanation of the premise? First WG shows up, then she has this vision, then the Hounds maybe come by, and then FMC finally says to Woman Warrior, "okay, tell me what this is all about." I was sort of thinking about cutting the chapter where she has the vision. Good move, or does it sound like it would work okay as is?

Hi, all. My first post here, though I've lurked a bit in the comments and tried to help people out.

My question regarding numbers is: Spell them out or write them all numerically?

Please note, I'm not asking this because I need help deciding. Rather, I'm curious where you all stand on the matter and hope to spark an interesting discussion. My experiences have taught me that this is a choice dependent on the writer in question with no right or wrong answer, per se. (Of course it's different if you're writing for a publishing house with its own style guide.)

For my part, I was taught that smaller/easy numbers should be spelled out (e.g. "fifty-five") and longer/complicated numbers (such as '1,999') be written numerically and I like it that way. But I have an irrational fear of numbers (outside date notation in the headers and page number notation and the like. I can deal with those), so the less numerical writing I have to do in-story, the better for my general health.

There's also the group that holds that numbers above 20/100 should be numerical, but everything below should be spelled out. And there's the question of placement and meaning, so for the sake of the argument let's suppose that we're talking about numbers used in dialogue or narrative. Say, a house number or a monetary amount a shopkeeper is quoting. How would you reflect that number in the text and why?

I hope that that's all clear. (I'm not exactly known for clarity, I'm afraid.)

Current Mood: curious

(no subject)

Anyone here good at being sneaky plotters?

Perhaps this is too simple, but...

Post-apocalyptic magic

So many plot problems. Oh my god.

random break up ideas?

What to Bring to a Colony World

What if a book had a mind of its own?

Religion in Fantasy

Shapeshifters

Crime ideas, anyone?

Ghost Trains

A valid reason for a woman to leave her child?

How do I get this exposition across?

Gun learning problems?

Chapters

Write what you know.

Honorifics for peasants and commoners

I found a plot hole

Numbers

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